Lately...

Lately, I have been a bummer to be around for some reason! I just turned 31 (gulp) and I swear I'm going through a midlife something-or-other. I feel like I've been having a hard time seeing the positives, and I feel like last year I didn't accomplish anything. But I know I did. I did go to real estate school, I did go to Cabo with Mandy and her family in January of this year,and I also went on a well needed trip to Las Vegas with my homegirls back in May.

I did read 11 books between February and May which is saying a lot for me, because I swear I have adult ADD to some degree. I seem to go through these bouts of "did I make the right choices" or "I don't feel like I'm living the life I envisioned". I hope that when I'm old and gray (and living in a rest home with all my old friends) that I can look back and tell some awesome stories and say "that was my life, how amazing.....this is who I am". I'm sure I'm not the only one that feels that way about their life. Sometimes it's hard to focus on the good when you can't get your mind out of the bad. I do have a great hubby and 2 awesome kids, but I think when you are a stay at home mom, you kind of 'lose' yourself. It's hard think of what your own interests are, and what you like to do. Your life is focused on your kids, husband, house, bills, and we are constantly reminded of all the horrible things happening in the world, when we watch the news. That is the one thing that I hate about the news. The first 98% of the show is about killers, natural disasters, war, gas prices, the plight of other countries, and the last 2% , they try to cheer you up with "Doris Weathersby is 110 years old today, so the governor came out to wish her a Happy Birthday!" *yipee, sigh* And I get so depressed from the beginning of the news, that all I can think about is "Well, first off, Doris is probably that old because of the preservatives in our food these days, and she probably is embracing the idea that she will die soon, because of all the horrible things going on in the world, and lastly, she probably has no clue that the man wishing her Happy 110th Birthday, is the governor. She probably thinks he's a nurse at her nursing home!" Now that I say that, I'll probably be in her shoes one day :) For the record, 30 isn't all it's cracked up to be. So 31 will be better. I plan on learning the guitar or piano. I'm going to try really hard to focus on the good. I'm going to 'better' myself, and do things that I'll remember forever. I will read more books.
I did have a different post on here, that pretty much said "woe is me", but after I read it, I didn't want to keep it up. So, I'm havin' a redo. That is the greatest thing about this blog business. I wish some parts of life you could get 'redos' but I know that having regrets will only make you sad. I always try to say "I do not regret the things I've done, just those I did not do". Now if I could just try to live by that a little...